Crab Battle

WARNING! This area may or may not contain crabs. In the event of a crab battle, follow these important steps:

1: Maintain safe distance from pincers of steel.
2: Apply goggles to avoid horrible eyeball removal.
3: Assume horse stance.
4: From this position, begin performing native dance to the tune of "High Voltage" by Electric Six.
5: Once crab is paralyzed and confused by nu-disco tunes, retreat to safety.
6: Nuke site from orbit to be sure.

Crab battles cost dozens of lives each year. Studying these instructions and remembering them well may save the lives of you and your loved ones. Do not be decieved by the dimunitive frame of crabs, do not attempt to communicate or socialize with them. Should these steps prove ineffective, assume fetal position and weep.

IN BEFORE: LOBSTERS NOT CRABS!